The Bad Days
Hey all, Reid here. I invited Meghan to do a blog post because we’re doing similar things these days and I wanted to cross promote our causes to our audiences. Additionally, the blog post she writes below her intro is something that I think will speak to a lot of us with Crohn’s disease or Ulcerative Colitis. Here’s Meghan…
So you’re reading this, probably wondering who I am, and why the heck I’m posting here. Well, first of all I’m Meghan, and I’m an Epileptic (“Hi, Meghan”). I have intractable epilepsy, and I’ve had it since I was a kid. I’ve been on more medicines than I’d like, and some days I’m barely able to function but the fact is I’m here, and I’m fighting.
I’ve known Reid through the inner workings of the interwebs since what seems like the dawn of time. Both of us recently realized that we’re in similar situations through the joy that is Facebook. We’re both raising money, we’re both fighting for cures. We are in the same shoes, just different colors. I’m not going to repeat my story, as you can read it on my blog and you can read more about my fundraiser here.
Some days are good, some days are bad. The good days are wonderful. You get to enjoy time with your friends, smile, laugh and know that it’ll be OK. The bad days you really feel the urge to just sleep the world away, and you pray that maybe tomorrow will be a good day.
Yesterday, well yesterday was a bad day. I had gotten home, and then… Well I don’t remember a lot of the evening. I ate, and then the seizures started rolling in. I said something on Twitter about it. My mom says she called. I slept. I slept a lot. 11pm rolls around and I decide to make my way up to bed. My legs were wobbly, I was wandering around like a staggering drunk.
To be honest, at some point I should have gone to the ER. I should have let them look at me. Make sure I wasn’t going brain dead or something stupid. Only problem with that is, they don’t know what to do with me. I can’t take Ativan anymore, their weapon of choice… So what? They stare at me while I feel miserable, and I feel even more miserable because I’m in an ER with blood taken and needles everywhere.
Knowing there’s nothing that they can do. Knowing that the best they can offer is next to nothing. That’s a kind of nightmare no one deserves. I mean, most people when they get sick they can go to a doctor, be given a pill and go home. They may not feel better immediately, but a few days they could. Even cancer patients have treatments. But there’s not much they can do with me. Not much other than use me as a pin cushion.
Today, I should stay in bed. I should watch some Netflix & sleep. But I refuse to give up my day because yesterday was a bad day. I refuse to let that happen. Today could be a good day, if I give it a chance.